Sharing Ideas Sharing Thoughts

Since 2015, I have been in a constant "learn and Build" mode. Like all immigrants almost everything was new for us in Canada and we had to learn to be a part of this new system. Top this up with the academic learning of my MBA. Drip by drip we did it like countless others but all of the above pales in comparison to the "Learn and Build" mode that I was sucked into after my MBA. From learning how to start and run a company, to building a product to learning about an industry, about the suppliers and customers, technical stuff, regulations -  the list is endless. Constantly scouting for new opportunities and problem solving on a daily basis made the whole experience very intense. I would argue that more than the external learning, the highlight of the last several years has been the internal deep dives that I  took to learn more about myself. Learning is followed with improvements and therefore this iterative process has helped me create a new improved version of mys

 There are three ways to know how much progress you have made: 1. First - Acknowledgement or approval from others. This can happen at two levels - global and local. Let's first take the recognition at the highest level. Let's say winning a Nobel Prize or an Oscar. Data suggests that the fame is short-lived, controversial and impersonal. The public will soon find their next hero.  At a local level - say within our company, it feels good to be celebrated. And it is indeed an acknowledgement of our hard work. But is it an indicator we should watch? There is no doubt that recognition is reassuring but it is not something worth aspiring for. We are better off focusing on the task at hand than on the result. 2. Second - Compare yourself with others. This is never fulfilling. Rich want to get super-rich. The truth is - man can never have enough of anything. One may experience all sorts of negative emotions when comparing oneself with others.  3. And finally the third way is to ask - A

Imagine a highway on which all of us are driving our cars. We can obviously drive our car the way we want.  But aren't we often frustrated about not driving our car to it's full potential. We end up with wishful thinking and regrets. Now imagine this - while driving our own car, we decided to call someone we care for. A few minutes into the call, we realize that he is not driving his car perfectly (as per us). And then we start sharing driving tips. he didn't ask for it but our good intention and deep love makes us share this unasked advice. And then we try to persuade him to drive his car in a way we feel appropriate.  He doesn't take our advice and we are the more frustrated.  Then why do we always try to steer others car?  Why can't we focus on our driving? Control the Controllables!

 Humans are fragile! We should be empathetic about others feelings.  "They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel" -  Carol Buchner, Maya Angelou, and others. Let me use the analogy of scratches on the car. It hurts, when we find a new scratch on our car. It may leave us a bit bitter inside. The scratches and scuffs on our car don't go away. The car is still usable and we move on. Similarly, most humans have emotional scars they may be unaware of. Our job is to make sure that we avoid hurting someone. Just be mindful of your words and actions.  I recently read somewhere - 'if this was the last time you are speaking with someone, how will you speak?' I don't mean that we should should be trapped in this fear while talking to people. I am suggesting that we should be more thoughtful and kind.  Be thankful for every moment you have with people around you. And above all - Love Unconditionally!

One of the reason why we cannot attain mastery is because we hold a short term view on almost everything.  We don't want to wait to see the results of our actions. We want tangible outcomes; right now. Our default setting is -  actions (input) = result (output).  We don't want to factor in time here.  One reason for this behavior is that we crave for certainty. We feel that there is no guarantee that working patiently on something over a long period of time will result in something rare & beautiful.  The marshmallow experiment is an apt example to prove this. However, we need to fine tune it to fit our case. In the experiment, the marshmallow is the prize for patience. There is no long term grind expected from the child.  If we are building something, we lay one brick at a time. And we do this joyfully over a long time. We start with a plan and we do have a framework. But we focus on laying this one brick that is in our hand!

If a rookie salesman is asked to sell a pen then most likely he will be aggressive, forceful, and desperate. He will jump on to explaining all the great features of the pen. A seasoned one will first check if the customer is in the market for a pen. If the answer is negative then the salesperson will not waste his time on this person. You cannot sell something to someone when he/she doesn't need it /want it.  If the customer is indeed in the market for a pen then a good salesperson will ask a series of questions to understand the exact needs & and pain points of the customer. The selling process will be easy and smooth after this. I am not saying that the sale will close but I am sure that this will build a relationship. Selling is all about people. Caring for them, helping them - genuinely. Similarly, we should not give unsolicited advice. Our intentions don't matter. If someone is not interested then it's a waste of time and effort. 

 We live in a world of specialization. Scottish economist, Adam Smith pioneered the idea of specialization in a free-market system. Smith highlighted that a group of workers will be far more productive if they specialized in one aspect of production. This is how our world works today. And that is why we look for specific skills and experience when hiring someone. Some people among these 'specialists' will identify inefficiencies in the system and will find ways to make things - faster, better and cheaper. But this optimization will max out at some point. To take things to the next level, we need new thinking.  Our world is large and complex. One cannot keep all the details in our brains. We need mental models - which is a representation of how things work. We need people who can simplify and model the various sub-worlds and develop an understanding of "How The World Works". These generalist can see the connections between the sub-systems of our world and therefore can

 Do simple things. For happiness and success.  Most of your peers are falling by the way side because they are imagining problems. 1. Sleep by 10 pm. Wake up by 6 am. 2. Food - Eat two good nutritious meals everyday  'on time' . Avoid processed foods and sugars. By doing this your gut health and overall health will be significantly better. And that itself will bring success and happiness.  3. Exercise - Basic stretching and strengthening exercises - 20 minutes daily. Do not miss. Yoga is ideal. No need for gym/marathons. Remember the aim is - good health and not social approval.  4. Study / Work - Deliver on time (even if the work is not perfect). Keep your mind open. Be curious. 5. Character - Make promises & Keep them. Be kind. Be helpful. Have highest integrity. 6. Web / Phone / Social - Minimize endless browsing. Your self-worth is determined by what you do and not by what your peers think. They are lost themselves. Believe in yourself. 7. Relationships - Just a few peo

We have played all three parts countless times throughout our lives.  Let me explain! Let's say we do not like someone's idea, opinion or belief. We first adopt the role of a judge by decreeing that their idea is flawed (We believe that ours is the best) Then we get into the lawyer mode by lining up our arguments to prove them wrong. (we want to win here) And since usually the other party won't agree, we feel miserable. We experience several negative emotions, such as anger, disgust, frustration. We now blame them for our emotional distress.  My take -  1. " Strong Opinions, weakly held " is a great way to be mentally agile. I am willing to change my mind in the light of new information.  2. People don't change because you are logical. The more forcefully you argue the more the other party digs in the heels. Present the information and encourage them to think for themselves. 

Have you done any experiments with your life? Or have you always accepted the safety & the status quo?  If you do not try new things in your life then its like having the exact same food and wearing the exact same dress everyday.  I think there is merit in moving out of our comfort zone and to have an inquiry mindset. That's when we discover not just new things but also our true potential. Looking closely you will notice that we are conditioned by what surrounds us.  Since childhood we believed in what we were told. It sounded safe and practical. Isn't it a survival mindset. Does it sound like we were too afraid to think for ourselves. How about doing small tweaks. How about asking some good questions? How about listening to your heart. When we find meaning in our life, we forge a path forward. That's when the thought of tomorrow excites us. Because that's when we have a purpose in life. 

 In his book - Drive - author Dan Pink talks about the importance of intrinsic motivation. Human motivation is largely intrinsic. It is something that comes from within.  Part of the magic of learning and doing is that we are inspired to do it. We are drawn towards that task. No one is forcing us to do it. It doesn't mean that when someone asks us to do something (like in a school or in a job) we cannot do it well. We certainly can. But at some level we have chosen to be there. For example if I make you sit in a classroom in the Harvard University, you will learn only if you choose to make the effort. Similarly, I can give you the summary of a book but you will get it only when you have found those nuggets yourself.  Life is all about making choices. Choose well and choose often.

 An AI (Artificially Intelliegent) program is only as good as the training it got and the data set it was fed. If the code is not excellent, if the data is not sufficient / relevant then the outcome is not going to be great. So it is with humans.  If we listen to, or read from, or get inputs from the same sets of people, books or media channels then we will be limited.  We socialize with our type of people and we gravitate towards the same type of books. Therefore, subconsciously we reinforce our beliefs and opinions. We do this because it makes us feel right.  Like a politician we campaign only to only our base and lobby for their approval. Let's challenge our assumptions and step out of your comfort zone.  "Vulnerability is not weakness; it's our greatest measure of courage" - Brene Brown

 To grow we need intellectual curiosity, a bias for action and a method to avoid repeating our mistakes. However, most of us are in self-destruct and self-paralysis mode. We all know what needs to be done and yet we fail to do it. This makes us feel miserable.  But why do we let ourselves suffer? Is it fear? Is it laziness? Or is it lack of will-power? Great people on the other hand go through the following virtuous cycle -  Curiosity -> Learn -> Action -> Mistakes -> Reflect -> Learn.  Successful people are a learning machine. They understand that taking action and not repeating the same mistakes are essential for moving forward. They have strong will and exceptional awareness. They may not have the highest IQ but they have good concentration and a very high EQ.  Therefore, the question is - what can someone who struggles with 'growth' do? Obviously good intentions are not sufficient. We need something more. I think the following may help: 1. Choose just one thi

Where in this spectrum does the young generation fall (age 15-30)? I'd argue that many people from this age group are not as mentally strong as their parents. They have a sense of entitlement and they lack gratitude.  There has been too much of "entitlement talk" for this generation and therefore let's try and break this down and see if it is true for this group of youngsters.   A sense of entitlement refers to the belief that one deserves certain privileges, benefits, or special treatment, without necessarily having earned them. This can manifest in different ways, such as expecting others to cater to one's needs, feeling deserving of success or recognition without putting in the necessary effort, or feeling that the rules don't apply to oneself. A person with a sense of entitlement may feel that they are entitled to certain opportunities, resources, or advantages, simply because of who they are, rather than because of their skills, qualifications, or hard

It happens to the best. From successful sportsmen to the average Joe.  We literally imagine things and punish ourselves. Somehow we are very creative in this pursuit.  Our rational mind may be telling us to stop imagining and start acting and yet we procrastinate and undermine ourselves. And that leads to self-paralysis (and in many cases partial self-destruction). We lose valuable time and self-esteem. And this weighs us down. It challenges our ability to see clearly our path forward and we may ask - "How can I know the right course of action, let alone peace of mind".  There is a simple way out 1. Take deep breaths. Do this often when you feel nervous. 2. Set small goals.  3. Force yourself to take action. This is the most important part.  4. Reward yourself. Please remember that there is no rescue boat. Nobody can / will come to save you. We have to fight and win this mental battle. 

Just close your eyes and ask - How many people feel that you are a good person? That you are not just thinking about yourself but about others too. That your heart is in the right place. Do these people think that you are a person of integrity. That you have empathy & compassion.  And do you think you are a 'kind' person? What do you think your values are? What is your true identity? This self-enquiry may perhaps help us understand what is important. Are we becoming the person we wish to become.  Because deep down we all are good. Sometimes we get scared about our future and start following the herd blindly. And we make the wrong choices. 

I am proud to say that today marks the 11th straight year of unbroken 11 years of daily practice of meditation and exercise. This is my personal best.  On March 09th, 2012, I decided to start meditation. Obviously I couldn't see this far then. And I wasn't sure about how long will I be able to continue. But God has been kind and I am going strong. I meditate twice a day (morning & evening) and I also do freehand exercises twice daily for 15 minutes. And I have not missed a single practice of meditation or exercise (that is twice daily) since last 11 years. I consider this a great personal achievement. As Paramhansa Yogananda said, "Meditation is concentration on God". Just like when we concentrate on our work, sports, reading, driving and so many things, when we concentrate on God and keep the distractions away then that activity is called meditation. Of course, peace is a by-product. It is not the target.  Is it hard? Yes and no! Depending upon your level of conc

Whatever we do everyday in our life; the work we do, the places we go to, the people we meet, the food we eat, the routine we keep,  - it should all be meaningful. It should be intentional. We should be living consciously.  Our thoughts & action should not only be a means of our self expression but should also help us grow into what we intend to be.  Often we make choices that do not truly reflect our identity. Sometimes we are too afraid. Sometimes, we don't make choices we'd like to. Instead we settle for something 'safe'.  How about living an authentic life? A life of purpose and meaning.  Let's live an inspiring life with creative variations.  Lets discover and pursue what we personally find meaningful. Let's embark on a journey of hope & transformation. Of learning & growth. Of adventure. 

The most important thing in life can be summed up in just these two words. Action - Take lots of action. Constantly. It means showing up and shipping out. 'just doing it' rather than overthinking, having analysis paralysis, doing wishful thinking etc. I am not saying one need to be rash in taking a decision and be mad about activity. Please think through a situation and then jump right in. You will be never more ready. It's about having a bias for action. Trying more improves the overall chances of success. It also improves our ability to take the next step. It's the opposite of over planning and believing that your first shot will hit the target. Even a lion has to run after 10 antelopes to get one (these are real stats). And lion is the king of the jungle. Perhaps we need to try 20 or 30 times to get it right or to do a sale. I have seen that those who move out and show up and are unafraid of taking action are the one's who are successful and happy. All top athele

 We work hard to earn and save money. But do we ever visualize what a typical day be like when you are old and retired from work? There are three important question to consider.  1. Will we have enough money to continue leading a good life? 2. How will our health be? 3. What will we do with all the time we will have?  We work on our retirement savings when we are younger and usually, we save enough for old age. In fact we over save. But do we do enough for the question # 2 & 3 above? Don't you think, it's a good idea to work on your health now? Just like we maintain our cars, should't we look after our physical health now and do whatever it takes to stay healthy? And when we are retired, the excess time will stare at us through the day (and night...think about it). We will not know what to do with so much time. Shouldn't we be developing some habits (such as reading, writing, meditation, social work etc) that will fill our days with purpose? In fact the excess free

 When someone you care for cannot see your point of view, it frustrates us. We classify our understanding as 'common sense' and therefore cannot fathom the non-acceptance of something so obvious (to us). That is precisely the point. It's obvious to us and not to the other person because we all have a different world view. We will be wiser if we realize that our aim should not be to align the other person to our world view. We can definitely present our idea and discuss it. But if they cannot see what we are seeing then the vice-versa is also true. We should therefore expand our consciousness. Imagine a very large pitch dark warehouse with thousands of aisles. Let's say there are 10 people in this warehouse and each one has a flashlight. Each one can therefore see only as far as the light shines around him. Now, you may shout from aisle 139 to your friend in aisle 20 and if you expect him to mould his understanding based on your consciousness, then that will be futile. I