Parenting : Part One

Every child is born with some pre-natal tendencies and is therefore unique. There are no standard answers for parenting. The post natal environment is in our hands and this should be the area of focus. Parenting requires loads of patience. I am far from being a 'perfect father' and I am learning this art through mistakes. My most basic thoughts on Parenting are as follows :

(I have used 'he' without any bias for boys)

1. Let the child grow in an environment of constant love and affection. Nurture the child and love him for what he is. Constantly guide, help and support him in the process.

2. Bring him up like a gardener who cares for his plants. The gardener does everything with deep love and carries out his duty with sincerity and devotion. The gardener provides water, fertilizer, removes weeds and even uses harsh chemicals when needed. He provides warmth through green house and lets the plant grow on its own on abundant dose of love and affection. His heart fills with joy when the sun shines and the plant enjoys the process of growing-when it swings in wind, dances in the rain and feels great. 

3. The parent must not be over-protective of the child. Else the child grows in an unrealistic world. He has to be made ready for the life's struggle and occasional storm. Do not be lenient and give in to the child's unjust demands. Remember, you are the guide here.

4. Spend time with the child and have fun. Its the best thing in the world to see your child grow and become a responsible adult.

5. Tell him-Its OK to make mistakes. Encourage him to try and explore. Make him love to learn and experiment with life. Let him choose and learn from his mistakes. Intervene only when there is a grave danger.

6. Lead by example. The language of do's and don'ts does not work. Child emulates his parents.

7. We all have our imperfections. Try and overcome them. We have to improve ourselves constantly so that the child does not see variance between our words and actions. And sees that it is possible to learn and grow.

8. The company that a child keeps, the food that he eats, the environment that he gets at home, in school and in his social world determines to a great extent, his future.

9. Tell him life is all about making choices.

10. Explaining via stories and examples is good fun. 

11. Explain the concepts in studies. Let it not be a rote. If he loves to learn then the battle is won.

12. Lastly, you would be a good parent, if the child grows up with a sense of self worth.

I would like to continue this series and would love to have your thoughts. Please comment.